Email War

U.S. military Priority of Work after entering Iraq:

1. Knock down statue of Saddam.
2. Set up e-mail and Internet.
3. Win hearts and minds.

I walk exactly 33 steps from the barn-like structure I live in—a row of horse stables on either side complete with rodents and flea but bereft of straw—to the chair at ‘The Office.’ Fewer than a dozen computers, and several make-shift desks assembled from left over pieces of scrap wood as well as a few phones, complete the dilapidated Tactical Operations Center. There are several officers and noncommissioned officers (NCOs) that work there 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.

As a former NCO-turned-commissioned officer, I’m happy to admit that ‘NCOs are the backbone of the Army.’

“Yeah, but this group has scoliosis,” one quick-tongued Staff Sergeant quipped. I told the same NCO that yesterday our boss looked at his phone and saw that he had one ‘missed call.’ He (our boss) emphasized to me that all of his phone calls must be answered, so I passed that along to the practical joking NCO.

Today Staff Sergeant G— told me with a giggle that he called our bosses phone 24 times while he wasn’t at his desk. We both laughed.